Golden

My two friends have been having issues since their wedding. I have no idea what is actually going on with their life but from what the picture I just saw on Facebook I'm hurt and disappointed with my friend. I know it isn't my right to judge from what I saw since I don't have the whole story but it still hurts me to know that something might be going on with another women that isn't his wife.

He's told me that he's been having issues with his wife and his wife has told me the same. The thing that worries me is that his wife has been pregnant and is due soon in a month and he's still not making mends. I'm worried for their future and their baby girl. I now it shouldn't be my concern but my friend is like my brother and I got close to his wife as well. It hurts me as a friend knowing that he's "cheating" on his wife and it hurts me objectively as a female.

He's told me that he'd eventually fill me in but I just don't know how I feel anymore. I'm a mixture of emotions: hurt, disappointed, and annoyed. I wonder where it went wrong . . .

Concert List

2005
'AMERICAN IDIOT Tour' @ Home Depot Center in Carson 9/9/05
Green Day
Jimmy Eat World
Flogging Molly

2006
'WARPED TOUR '06' @ L.A Dodger Stadium Parking Lot 7/12/06
UnderOATH
Helmet
The Living End
The Casualties
The Academy Is
Senses Fail
Rise Against

2007
'TASTE OF CHAOS' @ Long Beach Arena 2/22/07
Evaline
Aiden
Senses Fail
The Used
30 Sec. To Mars
SAOSIN
Chiodos

'INWARD SCREAM Tour' @ The Avalon, Hollywood 2/24/07
Bleed the Dream
Fair To Midland
Dir en grey

'DIR EN GREY SUMMER TOUR' @ the Gibson Amphitheater 6/18/07
Fall of Troy
Dir en grey

'Aiden Headlining Tour' @ El Rey Theater 10/9/07
1969
Drop Dead Gorgeous
Art of Chaos
Aiden

'PMX Convention' @ LAX, Los Angeles 11/10/07
Met Tomo of Echoscream
Thee Out Mods
LiN CLOVER

2008
JUDO CHOP Vol. 10 @ 2nd St. Jazz Bar 1/11/08
Motion Drive
The Power Cords
Quan Chinese Takeouts
Cloud Highland
Thee Out Mods

JUDO CHOP Vol. 11 @ 2nd. St. Jazz Bar 2/1/08
2nd Hand Justice
The Deepsea Goes
Running on Fumes
The Stitched Lips
Thee Out Mods

JUDO CHOP Vol. 13 @ 2nd. St. Jazz Bar 4/12/08
Lemon Drop Kick
Thee Out Mods

JUDO CHOP Vol. 16 @ 2nd St. Jazz Bar 6/6/08
DFT
Tadahisa Yoshida
Random Ninjas
Thee Out Mods
Kureha
Dig Jelly

Super Estrella's REVENTON! @ The Home Deopt Carson Center 8/9/08
Alejandro Fernandez
Juanes
Don Omar
Julieta Venegas
Beto Cuevas
(Among others which I can't remember at the moment.)


Tokio Hotel's U.S Tour @ The Anaheim House of Blues 8/20/08
Tokio Hotel

2009
Detour Tour @ House of Blues
On Parade
A Ska Band
A Long Beach local

'21st Breakdown Tour' @ Inglewood at The Forum 8/25/09
Franz Ferdinand
Green Day

'Carson Daly's New Years Eve' taping @ The Nokia Plaza 11/23/09
Green Day

2010
One Day As A Lion's US Debut Shows @ The Community Culture Center 7/18/10
Holloys
One Day As A Lion

Superestrella's Reventon @ The Staples Center 7/24/10
Belinda
Reik
Beto Cuevas
Maria Jose
Nelly Furtado
Ramon Ayala
Daddy Yankee
Enrique Iglesias
Ivy Queen
Alejandra Guzman
Chino & Nacho

'21st Century Breakdown Tour' @ The Verizon Wireless Amphitheater 08/31/2010
A.F.I.
Green Day

San Manuel Indian Bingo & Casino present: The English Beat @ House of Blues 10/29/2010
Starpool
The English Beat

The First Annual Ska Luau @ The House of Blues 12/30/10
Stupid Flanders
La Banda Skalavera
Chase Long Beach
Suburban Legends
Starpool

2011
Japan Daisuke Relief Concert @ Chain Reaction 4/04/11
Kid Finnish
Phlying Saucer
Melee
Suburban Legends

Suburban Legends @ Tomorrowland Terrance in Disneyland 5/12/11
Suburban Legends

Starpool @ The House of Blues 6/9/11
We Are the Arsenal
Save the Swim Team
HB Surround Sound
Suburban Legends
Starpool

Incubus @ Jimmy Kimmel Live in Hollywood 08/10/11
Incubus

I can't believe what you do to me...

It's been forever since I last posted on my blog mostly due to the insane amount of stress and work I've had with college applications. However today it is FINALLY all finished. I just submitted my final application for BU and all I have to do now is submit transcripts.

Anyways, last year on the 30th of December I went to a show with my friend Derek. We went to the first Ska Luau starring: Stupid Flanders, La Banda Skalavera, Chase Long Beach, Suburban Legends, and Starpool.



I must say that I've been enjoying ska shows a lot lately and I'm tempted to say that it's better than a punk atmosphere...

The evening started out nice. Derek and I were able to get out tickets at the box office before they sold out and we got a nice spot close in front. We walked in right when Stupid Flanders were playing and they were alright, not really my cup of tea. There was a huge skank pit though, and people got really rowdy. I love skanking, but I'm quite terrified when there's HUGE people in there and I know I'm going to get killed.

La Banda Skalavera was a mix of ska with salsa and cumbia. It was definitely an interesting mix. They had some good songs, but I felt like too many of them were too slow for the night. Some started off well but it went downhill afterward. The saxophonist was really cute though and it made me wonder where he's from. Columbiano? It was during this time that these two chicks rudely pushed their way up to the front; it was annoying as hell. They were recording the whole time and just being completely RUDE. The people around me ended up pushing 'em out though, THANK GOD, 'cause I would've been pissed if they stayed there the whole night.



By the time Chase Long Beach got on stage I knew it was going to get wild. They're a really well known ska band and they've got amazing tracks to skank to! I always love when there's a female in the band, it's the feminist in me that gets happy, lol.


Suburban Legends were next and by this time I had already reached the barricade (yeah!) and this chick I'd made acquaintances with was right next to me. She was really chill-- she came from Pasadena so that was cool. Surprisingly Suburban Legends were a lot of fun. My Asian fascination kicked it when I realized the singer was Asian haha. I think one of the main thing that makes this band fun and stand out is that they have audience interaction. I've attended a handful of concerts and I've noticed that those that involve the crowd during their performance make a stronger impact than those that create a bridge.

They covered "I Just Can't Wait to Be King" from The Lion King and it was totally great! I felt my childhood memories sinking in, and surprisingly I knew majority of the lyrics. :) They had some cool choreographed dance moves too.

It was during this band that I realized this creeper had been creeping on me. I don't think I've ever been so terrified in my life, especially at a show! Fortunately for me I had met amazing people that protected me from his creeperness. That bastard. I don't think I would've enjoyed the show if it wasn't for those amazing people I met.

Starpool went on next and they were SUPERB as always! I can't remember the set list but it was loads of fun. They played some new songs I hadn't heard before and it was nice just relaxing a bit and watching them perform. Their encore song was 'Shout' by the Isley Brothers and while I prefer Green Day's version of the song, they did justice and it was still great fun. It was a great feeling knowing that all the people on the barricade were rockin' out for Starpool. This had been their first sold out show and headlining gig.

T-Bone Willy gave me a Dum Dum and I ended up catching another as well along with a luau thingy. I don't know what it's called but it's this:


Overall the night was spectacular. ♥ I really can't wait to start driving (I got my permit last Wednesday!) so I can just follow their gigs around California. And now that it's the New year I wonder what will be my first concert of 2011; I can't wait to see what the world has in store for me academically, socially, and musically.

Okay, I feel better now

Yesterday I stumbled across the term "straight edge' due to Davey Havok's testimonial on "one Chance, One Life."

I must confess that I've never been much of an AFI fan until I saw them open up for Green Day in August and since then I've been engrossed with Davey's lyrics and their music in general.

I've heard the term straight edge since my elementary school years because of my cousin's friend who claimed to be straight edge. As a child I didn't grasp its meaning and I realized that it's exactly how I have been live my life. Some may claim that I don't necessarily have a choice with drugs because I'm a minor. In my defense, there are many adolescents who have became intoxicated despite their age. There is always a way to get past that-- age has nothing to do with it. As a matter of fact, it seems like it's much easier to become exposed to drugs and alcohol at a young age than when an adult.

I have a choice and one life that I'm willing to live to the fullest of my potential without including alcohol or drugs. That is NOT my scene; in my eyes it's degrading. I always cringe at the sight of a drunk women who lost her dignity by acting as a drunken fool in public.

When hearing Davey speak these words-- I saw grew to admire and respect him more than I did before. It's difficult coming across bands who live by the same philosophy.



This doesn't mean I' m going to shun all bands who drink because majority of the bands I like-- do. My favorite band, Green Day, drinks and has consumed drugs in their prime but I still adore them. I'm simply surprised to hear that there are bands like AFI who have the same views as me and many others.


On another topic briefly mentioned within the video: Veganism. Davey is a full supporter of this movement which I greatly admire! Being a vegetarian is a difficult task, let alone being Vegan. Thus I applaud his dedication.

I confess that I've attempted being Vegetarian but living in a Mexican household it's quite difficult eating a properly balanced meal.

Then there's also the debate about how God intended for certain animals to be eaten. As a Catholic I'm still unsure about this argument. I don't know what to believe when it comes to that situation.

In a nut shell I'm infatuated with Davey's dedication to his beliefs especially being in a rock band. Now I feel like I must meet him and thank him. I wouldn't necessarily bombard him with any AFI related questions-- maybe I'd compliment his band but it wouldn't go further than that. I'd ask him about being straight edge, veganism, and growing up in the East Bay.

As for my life I hope to keep my life alcohol/drug/cigarette free. Since middle to up to my senior year I haven't had the desire to do any of those mentioned above. I always tell my Mom this and she said it's good to have my mind set like that but that if I ever do drink-- it's okay to be a social drinker. Once she said that my mind was beginning to think in that mind frame, "Well maybe I will drink one day-- for fun." However after watching Davey's video I think I have a stronger mindset on not drinking at all.

I told my Mom about Davey's video and she's glad that I became inspired by him and that he's promoting that movement. I think she likes him now because of that ;)

I just hope that one day I get the opportunity to speak to him about these subjects. I know my chances are slim but I suppose I could always send a fan letter? Although I always become discouraged because I know he probably receives a plethora-- more than he could read! But it never hurts to try, right?

Blah

This past week has been an awkward one at home. I think my mother has been upset with me since a Tuesday afternoon. Since that Tuesday we haven't really spoke at all to one another and we hardly call another on the phone. If we do it's brief and to the point. In the car we hardly speak, just the usual and then it becomes silent except for the music playing on the stereo and my iPod.

It's odd though because yesterday we attended my tia's birthday party and we acted all normal like as if nothing was going on. Then I wake up this morning and it's like we've returned to being blunt in our responses. It's extremely awkward.

I believe the reason why she's so upset with me is because she had forgotten what was necessary and so I told her but with a loud voice. Then afterward she called me mean and that I get angry too much. The problem with that is she does that to me allllllll the damn time. Every time I forget something she becomes angry and practically screams at me whatever I forgot. It's degrading to me and it makes me feel like shite.

I hate the argument that comes up like, "I'm your mother." I don't actually qualify that as a valid contention. I understand she's my mother but that doesn't mean she has to be rude about it. It's not something I appreciate from my Mother.

I don't feel any shame and I wont apologize. So I guess I'll see how long this lasts. . .

Senior year = stress, stress, & stress.

Day 07 – Your favourite song from Morning View.
Day 08 – Your favourite song from A Crow Left of the Murder.

Morning View - Wish You Were Here
ACLOTM - Smile Lines
"Never act my age
You can tell by the lines in my smile
That I have been around for awhile
So, insecurities
Are about as useful as trying
To put the pin back in the grenade"

Senior year has been incredibly stressful thus far! So much for a relaxed year. :(

Why does it always rain on me?

My grandma has been depressed for quite some time now. She's been to the doctor and they prescribed her medicine but she hasn't taken it and refuses to because she says she doesn't want to become addicted.

The problem is that she's extremely depressed and her profile displays that melancholic feeling. My family overall feels awkward when we can see how she's feeling. We all want her to feel better but it's frustrating when she refuses to take the medicine!

I feel torn and worried. My grandma is old and I don't think I'm ready for her to pass away. Those thoughts always come creeping into my head and it's a real nuisance! I try to push it away but they always come lurking back.

I try to spend more time with her but I've also become busy because of the school year. I'm just so terrified and I don't know what I'd do without my grandma. She's like my second mother.

I can't talk to my Mom about this because I don't want to put these horrible thoughts into her head so I'd rather type them out onto here. Either way I feel like the rain is always pouring in this house hold, figuratively speaking.